1 Year Down, 1 To Go...

Hello All,

I figured I would finally sit down and try to knock out an e-mail update for the holidays before things get busy again. I am still writing the bi-weekly online articles about my experience and have switched from writing for GayWired.com to Advocate.com. These articles have been a great outlet for me which is why I have sadly neglected the blog.

As I wrap up my first full year in Mozambique, I can help but look how far I have come from when I was first stepped off the plane in Maputo or was delivered to my village 3 months later. When I began training in October of 2007 with sixty-nine other PCVs-to-be, I was generally frustrated. I was mostly upset with myself for leaving friends and family in the states and was wondering if joining the Peace Corps was the right decision (yea, I realize it was a little late to be thinking that, but still...).

The first two weeks were rough, but after sitting down with the head of training, she knocked some sense into me and made me realize that I wanted to be here and to make the experience count. However it was the first few months in my community that really put me to the test. I faced the same frustrations I did before, but this time I also directed my anger towards Peace Corps, my organization and members of my community. I was the first mulungo (white person) to live in the community since the Portuguese left and most people didn't know what to make of me. I would get ignored when I said hello to people, be turned down or left alone when I invited friends over for dinner, and was made fun of at work for the way I dressed, talked, acted, you name it. No one wanted to start projects with me or have anything to do with me.

Having spoken to former volunteers, they all said this was bound to happen and just to wait it out. Low and behold, one evening I was sitting on my veranda reading a book and all of a sudden, out of the blue, it hit me. Like a light switch, all my frustrations went away and I was filled with this whole new perspective on my new life here in Mozambique. It really was strange how it all happened so suddenly and without any real trigger. I continued to take calls from other volunteers who were also frustrated and I told them to just wait till the light switch went off. One by one, they all called me and described a similar revelation that I had experienced.

Anyways, since that evening I have truly enjoyed my time here and have viewed myself as a very minor character in a much bigger picture. I took the weight off my shoulders of being “The Mulungo” and instead just tried to be a member of the community. I continue to have frustrations with life here and the various situations that seem to only happen in Mozambique, but rather than let these moments trip me up, I learned to laugh them off and keep going. I have also learned to find joy in simple things that I see day to day, like groups of women singing or children playing. I've learned to slow down and appreciate sitting under a mango tree on an astera mat just enjoying the breeze. I have learned that I don't need to be doing something all the time, but can simply enjoy my life here and the simpler pleasures around me.

Because of my proximity of Maputo, I am able to make it into the city once every month or two for pleasure or on Peace Corps business. I have made a fantastic group of friends in there, consisting of gay and straight development workers from around the globe. One is a gay Puerto Rican who moved here from Seattle and has been like a mother to me. He, along with an adorable Argentinian HIV doctor and the always entertaining Ambassador to the Netherlands, have quickly become my posse and have kept me laughing. Several other development friends are former PC volunteers, so they have taken me in and made me feel at home. I spent Thanksgiving with them an about 40 other development workers at the house of my friend Mindy. I will try and put up pictures soon.

I recommended my village for an education volunteer and one was sent earlier this month. She seems nice and it will be good to have another person close by (about 20 minutes) to help settle in and exchange ideas. She is a chemistry teacher at the secondary school where I have my theater group and she might be interested in helping out with the kids. I have also started teaching the basics of yoga to some of the interested students and they really like it.

2008 has been a long and somewhat lonely road, but I wouldn’t change it for the world. Being alone has forced me to become comfortable with silence and with myself. It has made me appreciate the world around me and grow as an individual. And all in just one year! ;-)

No, I have a long way to go in life, even though my time in Mozambique is halfway over. But I am looking forward to the 2^nd half, in the hopes that I will continue to come across new experiences and learn new things.

I hope everyone has a great holiday season surrounded with their friends and loved ones. I give a big thank-you to my family who has worked to keep my spirits up this first year, which is the toughest. Also to my friends around the country, from the girls at AAFA to the WeHo Chamber folks to Jeffrey and Pey, my RPCV pals, for their care packages, letters and great e-mails. Despite not having everyone around, I cannot help but be reminded how very lucky I am to have each of you in my life.

Stay in touch and have a safe holiday season.

Love Always,

Z